Part Two

		Note from Mary: through a month-long program of constant whining and thinly veiled threats, I have managed to convince my husband Mike to finish the trip report I started about our March 2003 "family and friends reunion" visit to Walt Disney World and Universal Orlando! Clever of me, eh? Seriously, he's a lot funnier than I am, and I have really enjoyed reading what he has written so far. Don't believe a word he says, though. Well, okay, you can trust his restaurant reviews. Usually.

Okay, this is Mike. I'm going to take over here and continue the trip report 'cause Mary is a little busy with the site and getting ready for yet another trip to WDW. Business, she says! Ha!

I'd like to add a few comments here about things she's already mentioned in Part One. Although she's tried to present me in a good light, I feel that in a few cases I have to set the record straight.

First, as usual I did absolutely nothing when it came to putting the whole family trip/reunion together. Mary did everything. That's why I married her. We have a clear division of responsibilities in our marriage. She makes all the plans and arrangements for travel and researches everything. I watch TV and occasionally read a book. She makes lists of everything we'll need and washes all the clothes we'll be taking. I develop a thirst and get a frosty, cold beer to have while watching TV. She makes all the reservations for meals and hotels. I decide that some pretzels will go well with that beer.

Oh, and I carry the luggage -- well, at least I will if it isn't too heavy or when I can't find a luggage cart to handle it. On occasion I've also been known to throw a couple of snacks in my carry-on bag for the trip.

A good marriage is something you have to really work at, but if possible one should try and get the other partner to do all the work. It's a system that seems to work for me. Your mileage may vary, however.

So putting all that behind us, let's see what Mary left out of the first part of the report, shall we? First, with regards to the rental car. Arriving later in the day seems to reduce the choices available. It appeared that all the cars in National's Emerald Aisle were the same model -- or at least they were similar enough that differences weren't clearly apparent. [Note from Mary: in case you haven't guessed, Mike is not a "car guy" and can't tell a Camry from a Regal. All sedans look alike to him. I'm only marginally better in this regard.]

Anyway, the first thing we did was to make sure that the car we selected had cup holders. These are very important and as we discovered on a trip to Ohio last October, there are actually rental cars out there that do not have cup holders! We're not exactly sure what kind of car we rented that lacked such an essential amenity, but we think it was a Buick. The horror has clouded our memories to an extent, so it might have been an Olds - well, in any case it was something that we wouldn't normally be caught dead driving as those are for old people and we still cling to the illusion that we're still hip and cool. Or something.

I digress. Anyhow we got our land yacht and sashayed to the Hotel Royal Plaza. Quite a nice hotel it was too. Though it contained my family. First strike against it. I argued with Mary on this issue but she was adamant that a family get-together actually meant that we had to stay in the same hotel as the rest of the family. I love her dearly but she has the strangest ideas. So we confronted the family. They were all there, sitting in the restaurant. Waiting for us with knives sharpened and venom dripping fangs. Oh, and the parents were there also.

Dramatis personae:

My sister Suzanne (or Suzy, or Susi, or Sue or Something - she's changed it pretty much every year of her life so I'm not always up on the current naming conventions. Rumor has it that she changes it frequently to confuse the authorities so they won't be able to serve her with warrants). A tough as a brick nurse with a heart of gold, or was it a soft mushy nurse with a heart like flint? I guess it depends on whether or not she's withholding your medication today.

She is married to Bill. A slightly menacing shaven headed good ol' country boy from the bayou. Not the sort you want to meet while canoeing down the river in the backcountry if you know what I mean, wink, wink (banjo twangs in the background). He and I share a common interest in Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games. [Note from Mary: for the uninitiated, he's referring to such games as EverQuest and Ultima Online.] Therefore our respective wives spent the entire trip trying to keep us apart so we wouldn't go find a bar somewhere and hole up for several days talking about game mechanics, stats, and stuff like that.

Their children are Molly (9), a sweet child whose primary career choice in life is to be a princess, and Cooper (7), Minion of Satan, though his duties are largely ceremonial.

Also along for the ride was Coleen, my youngest brother's ex-wife, the sweetest person in the whole world, and her children: Sidney (8), she of the blinding bright platinum hair, and Eric (10), probable future target of outraged fathers over a three-state area.

Coleen's mother, Kathy and her sister Carmel were unbelievable. They babysat some nights and then went to the parks from opening to closing. They win the 'Show up the Younger People' Award hands down.

Kym and her friend Karen from New Orleans, friends of Sue's, were a ball of laughs. Kym's child is Alex (8), who I think might be suffering from narcolepsy. She was able to fall asleep everywhere. Possibly including standing up in line. A useful skill to have.

My brother Stephen couldn't make the trip and sent his daughters instead while he frolicked with his lady friend at Mardi Gras in New Orleans. He assured us that he didn't want to deprive them of the chance to visit Disney World with the rest of the family and that the fact that he was partying hard while they were gone was done only to assuage the grief he felt in missing this once in a lifetime opportunity.

His girls are Caroline (14) and Leigh (12), who are much too responsible for their ages and pretty much kept all the younger ones under control during the trip, with the possible exception of the Minion of Satan mentioned previously. Mary and I agreed that these two were keepers.

Don, Mary's brother, is an employee and minion of the Anti-Christ, Bill Gates. He is an uber geek and I grovel at his feet in admiration of his vast and all encompassing knowledge of all things geeky. He and Mary spent much of the trip comparing 3D camera sizes and capabilities. Some sort of compensation going on there I'm sure.

Don's wife, Sarah is a real sweety and former children's librarian. I've always had a soft spot for librarians (and this little fantasy about them where… no, possibly not a good time for that). She is Don's minder and keeps him from walking into traffic while he's fiddling with his camera.

Don and Sarah's children are Roland, whose reading comprehension at age 5 probably exceeds mine, and Malcolm (2), who might have the biggest eyes ever. I mean we're talking freaky large - I feel like he's looking through me with X-ray vision or something.

My Dad. What can I say about him? Well, Mary told me that this was a family web site so it really cuts down on most of my comments. Remember Lou Grant from the Mary Tyler Moore show? Well, Dad would make him cry like a little baby. Oh, and he likes to eat babies too.

Carol, my Dad's lady friend. Still getting used to this whole Dad dating concept. It's a bit unsettling. And Carol doesn't help - she's much too nice for him and needs to be told the truth before it's too late! I thought it was quite a bit to heap on her with all the family and stuff, but she held up like a trouper.

Okay now that I've given a shout out to everyone you're all famous. Now get off my back!

So to continue with the actual trip report. For dinner at the Giraffe Café the first night I had buffalo wings and salad. I find that one can eat really fatty and unhealthy stuff if one balances it by ordering something good for you like salad. It's not actually necessary to eat the healthy stuff, the fact that you have it on the table is usually enough to get most of the beneficial effects. The wings were all right though they could have used more sauce. The salad looked nice.

One comment on the suite at the hotel. A surprising omission considering the size of the suite was a table and chairs. If someone wanted to eat in the room they would have to use the coffee table which is a little low to be truly comfortable. Didn't matter much to us, as we weren't planning on in-room dining, but it is something to keep in mind.

After reading Mary's account of the first day at Epcot, I felt that I needed to set the record straight. From her report it sounds like my Dad and I just lazed around the pub while we sent the women to get the car. Well, actually, that's pretty much how it happened. I had another pint of Boddington's while he had another bourbon and water. We then ambled over to the boat dock outside the rear entrance to Epcot and waited for the boat. Fortunately even though we were under cover I had the foresight to have packed two raincoats in my backpack. So even though we weren't really exposed to the rain we were both well equipped for wet weather. I suppose I could have offered one of the raincoats to Mary before she and Carol left to get the car, but I was pondering which ale to order next at the pub and the thought pretty much never crossed my mind. Planning ahead - that's the ticket.

As Mary recounts, dinner at V&A's was excellent, other than the less than stellar service. One note - after we arrived back home and got the next credit card bill we found we had been double billed. Interestingly enough the second charge was not exactly the same as the first - it was off by a few dollars and some odd cents. Not sure what was going on there but we quickly disallowed the charge with Amex.

Monday, March 3

Still stuffed after the feast the night before, we made our way past the hotel coffee shop and hitched a ride on one of the buses to Disney-MGM Studios [editor's note: as of 2008, this is called Disney's Hollywood Studios]. The front of the park was surprisingly packed but the rest of the park was not especially crowded. We snatched a quick ride on Tower of Terror and then grabbed a couple of FASTPASSes for Rock n Roller Coaster.

We met Mary's brother Don and his wife and kids for lunch at the Prime Time Café. I had never actually eaten there before. We got in before they had actually started seating anyone and enjoyed a bit of banter with the waitresses, who are all in character as 'Mom'. Mom doesn't like to see elbows on the table and makes you set the table too. Pretty enjoyable place, though it is a bit loud - guess noise just reverberates off all those formica table tops.

We started with the trout dip, which was tasty and rich, and an order of onion rings, which aren't really rings, but more like onion threads. Those were so-so. I made the mistake of getting the recommendation of 'Mom' - a chili dusted chicken breast sandwich. It wasn't bad but I had briefly considered getting the pot roast and regretted not doing so afterwards. It looked pretty good. Mary had the turkey sandwich with cranberry mayonnaise. She insists on doing things like this even though I continually point out that mixing fruit with meat is sacrilegious. She liked it fairly well, even though it was an abomination in eyes of the Great Grill Cook in the sky. Don and Sarah had the meatloaf, which they said was okay.

Mary got an Electric Soda ($5.99). This is a regular soda in a kids' plastic drinking cup, but it comes with a plastic ice cube that has a light in it that can be turned on or off by tapping it on a table top - or any other hard surface that makes a satisfying 'thwack' noise. By the time we left the restaurant the sound of all the children smacking the ice cubes on the tables was deafening. We passed most of the rest of our family at another table and Mary gave her ice cube to one of the kids. This of course caused a great hue and cry as all the other children demanded their own electric ice cubes. We cackled evilly and were on our way.

We went to the Rock n Roller Coaster after lunch and Mary kindly gave her FASTPASS to Don, who had never been on the coaster and wouldn't normally be able to go, because his wife doesn't like roller coasters. Still, even with this obvious character deficiency I can see why he married her (cause she's like a librarian and ... No. not now). We then wandered over to the playground based on the 'Honey, I Shrunk the Kids' movie set, which is pretty cute. Kids like it a lot.

After this it was time for yours truly to go back to the hotel for his nap. Ah, naps. The best invention ever.

My nap took quite a bit longer than I expected and we hadn't really planned on doing much more so we decided to take it easy and just hang in the hotel for the evening. We had quite a bit of beer and soda left so we decided to go and get some snacks and have everyone come back over for some more carousing that evening. We popped over to Goodings and got some cheese and snacks and a couple more bottles of wine. And a six pack of good beer (Heineken) for me.

Dinner in the Giraffe Café again. I settled for a dinner salad 'cause between dinner at V&A's the previous night and the very substantial lunch at the Studios, I wasn't up to my usual trencherman performance. A sign of aging I guess. The salad was adequate though they did put strips of American cheese on it which is something I think should be given criminal penalties. Mary's Asian Chicken salad was quite nice and every time her back was turned I snatched a little more of it.

Tuesday, March 4

After Monday's hectic schedule we decided to tone it down a bit. Mustn't exhaust ourselves. We wandered over to Animal Kingdom, not 'cause we were particularly interested in going to the park but so that we could spend more time with Mary's brother and his wife. It had been a couple of years since we last saw them, whereas we last got together with all the members of my side of the family during Christmas.

Interestingly enough we saw more animals on the Kilmanjaro Safari than I remembered seeing on previous trips. One mini-rant: I wish Disney would get rid of the lame poacher plot on the Safari. It's silly and stupid and the cast members obviously feel the same way, as every time we've been on the attraction they've just been going through the motions. Kill this already.

We hit several of the walkthrough exhibits also, and the kids enjoyed these quite a bit. [Note from Mary: we also went to the new Dinoland USA section, where Roland had a good time on TriceraTop Spin, which is basically Dumbo, but with dinosaurs. I know a lot of people have complained about the "carnival" look of this area, and I agree that it's unfortunate. That said, kids seem to like it!]

After spending the morning looking at animals looking at people looking at animals, we left Animal Kingdom behind and went back to the hotel and picked up my Dad for a quick jaunt over to Epcot and the Chefs de France. We've always liked this restaurant and try and get in one meal there on every trip.

This visit was a disappointment. I ordered the crepes with chicken. Now every time I've had chicken crepes they've had a cream based sauce. For some reason they decided to throw out convention and went with a tomato infused sauce, which was lackluster. And the crepes were apparently made with buckwheat and resembled tortillas more then crepes. They were actually crunchy. Quite strange.

Mary's vegetarian plate apparently has replaced the vegetable gratin that we have had here several times and enjoyed a lot. The new version was dressed with a lackluster tomato sauce that was too salty. The appetizer plate with various pates, coldcuts and cheeses went a long way to dispelling the disappointment of the main dishes. At least this hasn't changed. As it stands now we'd recommend trying the charcuturie plate and a beer for a light midday repast and skip the entrees until they get back on track.

To cap off the day we decided to go back to the hotel and spend the afternoon napping, reading and in my case drinking additional cold, frosty slightly alcoholic beverages. We roused ourselves in the evening to go to Pleasure Island.

As usual we made a beeline for Adventurer's Club, where we met my dad and my sister and sister-in-law. Their first trip. Dad thought it was silly, so he got the point. The women liked it a bunch.

As it was getting late, we decided to grab a bite to eat. Unfortunately the choices in Pleasure Island are pretty limited - basically sausages I believe. We went out to Downtown Disney and the women wanted to try Planet Hollywood. This was my first visit to one, although there is one here in San Diego. But the two times we actually tried to get in to our local Planet Hollywood, they told us there was a 20 minute wait. When I glanced in and saw that fully half the tables were empty, we always walked away. Restaurants that play games like this are on my 'Do Not Patronize' list. But the choice wasn't mine this time.

When we entered we were surprisingly told it would only take a minute to be seated. The music volume in the lobby was very loud, so I asked if there were any tables where the music wasn't quite as loud. This earned me a smirk in reply. Again surprisingly we were seated in some sort of booth that had walls cutting out most of the noise in the main dining room.

To be truthful I can't remember what we had. We just pretty much picked one of each item on the appetizer list and shared those. And for the final surprise of the night - it wasn't bad. Not bad at all. Much better than I expected. I guess I was ready for the quality of food I've eaten at Hard Rock Café but this was much better. Of course fully half the stuff was fried, so we knew that we'd have at least the breading to nibble on.

Would I recommend Planet Hollywood to others? Nope - not unless you like relentlessly pounding music and snotty hostesses. And for the money the food wasn't that great. It certainly doesn't inspire me to go back and try the one in San Diego. But overall, you can do worse.

On to Part Three!

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